I have recently discovered, that there is a theory that only certain people are born with empathy. In relation to sympathy, which is a harmony of feeling, empathy is a deeper, more vicarious connection to another’s experience. It is one of the best character traits to have, but it is possible that if you were not born with it, you will never have it! It could be that possessing true empathy is like being born with blue eyes! We all experience disappointments in some people. Their lack of connection to a myriad of individual situations is frustrating at best. But this plausible idea has been an epiphany for me. It has freed me from some of my relational prostrations, and made me realize that some may not be capable of walking in another mans shoes.
This lack of empathy can also lead to the not so favorable trait of righteousness. If someone cannot relate to another persons experience, then that posture is ripe for judging.
So for those of us out there that nurture, and are in touch with their ability to empathize, we need to share it, and if we don’t get it back from someone, then maybe that person is not capable of the gesture. Lowering my expectations for the empathy exchange, has freed me from much disappointment. If your empathy tank is low, be conscience of filling it up, trying on some different shoes, and adding on a new intense awareness for a richer life. Stephen Spurling
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